The Re-Education of Our Bodies
I talk to literally hundreds of women that are exploring cutting edge humanistic sex education, somatic sex education or more simply stated - hands on sexual 'healing' and exploration. What I prefer to refer to these experiences as a re-education of our bodies.
AND the number one question is "Will I be safe?"
That's the most complicated question to answer, because there isn't a straight forward response.
What does being safe mean to you?
Of course you will not be harmed in any kind of physical or emotional way. That is the hope whenever we see a professional holistic practitioner that we trust with our care. But safe? A part of me wants to answer..."Of course not! But you will be "safe enough" to do the kind of edgy soul changing work that you are hoping for.
Is that why you are truly showing up? To feel safe? Or, are you showing up to push your boundaries and comfort zones? To feel things that you have only read about in books? To explore and heal places that perhaps you could not get to through pills, shakes, and Dr. Oz?
Going deeper into your body and mind can be really challenging. Sometimes, it can really make you feel uncomfortable because you are touching all kinds of new and old feelings. So, no, you will not be safe from any of that. Sometimes, you may feel like you want to run away. That is a challenge any time that we want more in our lives. It's about digging in, and getting terribly real with ourselves. That's what hands on somatic approaches provides.
It's an opportunity to explore your sexuality, desires, and body image in a way that is all about you.
Step-by-stiletto step, it can feel exciting, eye opening, earnest, pleasure filled, and magical. On your journey you will be flipping the switch on your erotic engine in ways that you never thought was possible. That’s the powerhouse motor fueled by sexual energy that propels every aspect of a woman’s life--sexual pleasure, relationships (from mother-daughter to lover to her own body), education and even success in business.
Safe? Will I be safe?
Well, it all starts with you. Your body. Your humble vulva and and precious pelvis. Every woman’s got one. The problem is it’s only the rare woman who knows how to access and use its magic powers for self-transformation.
Right now, I am sitting in amazement with 8 women out of billions of women in the world. And they can't believe how blessed they are to have been brave enough to show up. They know that they are less an a percentage of all the women in the world who are accessing their bodies in this way.
It is astounding.
Somatic practice is offering an opportunity to explore this place in yourself and learn how. The goal is to power up, rediscover or perhaps to find for the first time that hotbed of energy and harness it to unleash each woman’s full potential.
Do you want to feel integrated, powerful, sensuous and seen? Do you want to look at your sexuality through a different lens then you ever have before? What if sex is not just there for attracting men, orgasms or making babies? And what if you could have all that and the secret sauce too if you wanted it? ~Pamela Madsen, Back to the Body: Sensuous Retreats for Women
Naomi Wolf has taken on the subject of the vagina-heart-brain circuit in her inevitably controversial treatise and NY Times bestseller, “Vagina: A New Biography.” Though it’s met wild adulation and bitter criticism, the message is compelling. When the circuit, a dopamine-oxytocin-opiate loop in physiological terms, is intact and uninterrupted, women are in a state of genuine well-being: capable, confident and sexy. When that loop is disrupted, severed, shamed or abused women numb out. They get depressed, anxious, have low libido and dare I say it, suffer “hysteria.” While Wolf’s analysis may be bitterly contested by some, her understanding and defense of the genital-brain connection is one that we've studied and established empirically.
What she didn’t explain in any great detail is how to acknowledge and complete that circuit so that we women are steadily charged, activated, open to and ready for life. That’s what this is all about.
Will you be safe? That concept of what is safe is perhaps forever changed?
Yes....you will be safe in the deepest sense of the word. You will be honored and revered. Your voice and choice will be heard, acknowledged and in charge.
And you will also be busted open, and alive like you have never been in your entire life.
Pamela Madsen is the author of Shameless: How I Ditched the Diet, Got Naked, Found True Pleasure...and Somehow Got Home in Time To Cook Dinner and creator of Back to the Body: Sensuous Retreats for Women. Her work can be found at www.backtothebody.org
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